My entire life I’ve never been one to display or feel emotions like everyone else. Suffering from Synesthesia and being diagnosed with mental health conditions has given me answers but not understanding. I’m still going through the motions of understanding how to deal with thoughts and feelings.
I remember some dark days in my younger life, where my feelings and thoughts were so much I contemplated my own life. Negative feelings , negative people and negative surroundings .I couldn’t grasp concepts of why things were happening to me the way they were, and why I didn’t have the same mechanisms to cope and interpret like everyone else did. It took years to find my self-esteem and self-worth again, years of understanding that others opinions of me didn’t matter. What matters is how I see myself.
I find that other people’s moods and emotions can easily effect my mood. I take on the weight of other people’s problems, involuntarily. This is why it’s important for me to surround myself with positive energy. You never know what other people are going through in life, to make judgments on why they may be acting in certain ways, without full knowledge or background is a hard thing for me to learn and implement. I take everything literally and personally, I find it hard to detach from negative emotions surrounding me.
The first thing that helped me was to surround myself with positive people, ones who are always smiling. Ones that fill my heart with joy not negativity. My aunt use to say “if you hang around shit too long, you start to smell like shit “this couldn’t have been truer… only I had to drag myself through the shit to learn this the hard way.
The second thing was learning to understand Chakras.
For those of you who don’t know Chakras are the seven centres of spiritual power in the body. These are the energy centres which regulate everything within our bodies, from breathing, organ function, emotions and thoughts.
Each Chakra has its own colour, each colour has its own vibration and frequency. The colours of my chakras help me relate my feelings to a specific part of the body to recognise what it is I’m exactly feeling within that present moment. Prior to chakra work I would always just get angry when I didn’t understand my emotions or feelings and then project my anger out to whatever I could physically and emotionally. Its ok to cry , its ok to not understand your emotions all at once in that present moment . Its constant work and I’m still working on it , I hope one day to be able to open up and balance all my Chakras with a sound body and mind . I hope to be able to heal and understand.
7 Chakras, Colours & Functions
The Crown ; Purple– Wisdom , Transcendence , universality
The Third Eye : Indigo – Extrasensory perception , intuition , inspiration
The Throat : Blue / Turquoise – Personal truth , Etheric expression , communication
The Heart : Green – Compassion , love , integration , relationships
The Solar Plexus : Yellow – Will , Social self , power
The Sacral : Orange – Emotions , Creativity , Sexuality
The Root : Red – Safety , Grounding the right to live .
Lesson number 10 : The journey of Self-discovery is the best path you can lead yourself on .