Living with OCD – The Somewhat Perfectionist

Prior diagnosis I never understood why little things would annoy the crap out of me.

People assume having OCD makes you a neat freak, not for me. I’m either a super clean freak or a super mess.

I now understand wouldn’t drink out of certain cups because of how the handle was placed on the cup. Why I wouldn’t do the dishes if there was an odd number of dishes in the sink. Why putting makeup on in the morning would send me into an episode if everything wasn’t in its place.

These are things I’ve now learned to deal with though positive self-talk and acceptance.

Understanding has now given me an insight into ways to handle my OCD.

White benches still drive me crazy & I tell myself  it’s not my mess , so don’t touch it haha ; otherwise ill spend hours scrubbing the benches or cleaning up after other people.

Ohh how acceptance can change ones thoughts and actions.

I use to get up and down checking if id locked doors or checking I had turned my hair straightener off.  Now with my memory slowly working its way back to normal I’ve learned to trust my mind. I always thought maybe I was a little too paranoid, but no. Seeking help let me learn more about OCD and how it can manifest itself. My anxiety medication has helped in wondrous ways .

I wouldn’t trade my OCD for the world, although I’ve had to colour coordinate most things I own & line everything up in a neat line.

I’m starting to appreciate the gifts that come along with my conditions. I’ve learned to channel my obsessive compulsiveness into things like, always having breakfast in the morning & going to church every Sunday.

Although I’ve taught myself to allow myself to step on the cracks in the footpath, there are still things that are a work in progress – Like my handwriting. God help me if I have to write another birthday card. Unlined paper is a bit of a battle still for me, but there is always a work around thank god for technology!

Some characteristics of my OCD are of benefit, like hand washing . I bet I have had less sick days than you 🙂  .

Thought i would share a  positive affirmation one of my therapist taught me

” I am a new person today , my mind is calm . I feel deeply relaxed and comfortable . I deserve the peace i feel . I find it easy and natural to relax , My energy is continually  replenished . Peace abides in me ”

Don’t hate, appreciate.

Lesson 4 : If it’s not your mess don’t clean it.

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